the point of my masculinity and male positivity posts are to underline that masculinity and manhood are seen as a threat or in direct opposition to queerness, and that often times in order to be seen as queer you have to be partially or wholly feminine or gender neutral, or express your manhood in a feminine or gender neutral way in order to no longer be threatening, invasive, or a problem.
it is very difficult to exist in queer spaces as a hyper masculine person & a man. you’re made to feel like you need to walk a tight rope feeling like you’re inherently out of place, as if you existing and being masculine or a man in queer spaces makes others uncomfortable inherently.. just know that when i make positivity posts it is to remind us all that masculinity/manhood and queerness are not opposites and that you do not have to be a feminine man or masc person to be viewed/seen/heard as queer.
chasing men, masculine people, and masculinity out of queer spaces isn’t helping anyone currently and won’t help anyone down the line. please accept masc enbies, butches, bears, and masculine trans men with the same kindness, love, and passion that you do neutral and feminine people. that’s the point when i make these kinds of posts. thank u
This is 100% thanks to the “No kink at Pride” people. Because?
They didn’t want these men at Pride. This is a leather daddy. (A rather covered-up leather daddy, because this addition doesn’t do anyone any good if it’s flagged into invisibility, but best believe that dude has hella abs under there, and a 50/50 chance of heavy tattooing.)
Here’s another. Again on the modest side for the sake of not triggering the automod thing, but you can see the interplay of queerness and masculinity—particularly a kind of forward, unashamed sexual explicitness, if you take a look at their crotches. That’s a kind of…for lack of a better term, mating display. “I have this and want to use it, or at least know there are men here fantasizing about me using it.” It’s akin to a woman wearing a plunge neck. You’re supposed to look, and if you’re a dude, he’d like you to like it.
These dudes (well, most of these dudes)? They’re bears. (I said “most” because the guy in the sunhat is technically a cub. He’s too young to be a bear.) The furriness and the beards and the age and the bellies ARE THE POINT. The name “bear” is an affectionate one. Literally “I’m big and hairy!” In the 00s there was a stereotype(?) that bears were also super-cuddly. I don’t know how true it is, but I can confirm every bear I’ve ever met gives amazing hugs. They will readjust your spine, your touch starvation, and your entire outlook on life.
None of this touches on the rather large queer kink communities around “men in uniform.” Military, police, construction, I can’t tell you how many strip nights I’ve been to at a local gay bar with a guy dressed as a sexy firefighter getting absolutely swamped with dollar bills and lap dance requests.
You aren’t seeing these men because they’ve been forced out of spaces THEY CREATED. One of the best things you can do is to help bring them back.
They’re not threatening, they’re not disgusting, they’re not somehow dangerous just by virtue of being open about their sexuality and sexual desire. They’re just human beings who human slightly differently than you.
But more importantly?
They’re family. And don’t you forget it.
The marginalization of masculinity within the queer community also makes the entire community actively less safe. Masc folks are denied community and support, androgynous or feminine people who do not or cannot meet arbitrary standards of presentation and are read as “too masculine” are vulnerable to harassment from within their own community. And the entire community loses a lot of the people who historically have been most inclined and best suited to defending other queers from outside threats.
After this poll is over, our winner will be crowned the patron saint of Tumblr. Then we will have losers brackets, a beatified bracket, Marian apparitions, and more!
stressing out so hard what’s the point of painstakingly finding a job so that u don’t have to rely on commissions and then having to rely on them anyway bc they won’t schedule you for weeks at a time
I’m particularly angry bc like. I got the job months ago and I’m surrounded mostly by new hires now. who are all being prioritized for regular hours over me, the person who some of the most experience. AND they’re still acting like they’re understaffed? like I LIKE this job. There are very few other jobs I’d enjoy as much. I WANT to work. if you need employees so bad why the fuck aren’t you letting me do the job you hired me for
when i was post op after top surgery i had a good friend there with me to help recover. but the nurse didnt get the memo and when i woke up she was like “ok i’m gonna go get your girlfriend and bring her in to see you!” and i remember being so zonked on anesthesia and so disoriented i just laid there thinking wow…… all that an they’re bringing me a girlfriend too this place is amazing
when gerard way sings “the broken, the beaten, and the damned” and when kermit the frog sings “the lovers, the dreamers, and me” they’re talking about the same people btw
kink at pride is easy af to explain to kids, idk what yall are talking about. “mommy, why is that mostly-naked man wearing leather?” because lots of gay men think it looks nice. “why is that guy on a leash with a mask?” hes playing pretend. “why does she have a whip?” she thinks its fun. you know how you like to play with water guns? its like that but only for grown-ups, and she wont play with anyone who doesnt want to play with her so we’re all totally safe
if your 6yo’s next question is “is that a sex thing?”, thats fucking wild and a completely different problem. for you. not really an “Us Problem” collectively for all pride-goers, tbh. something’s going on there thats hard to call the dominatrix’s fault
homophobes think that being gay is already a weird sex thing thats hard to explain to kids. did yall forget that already? why are you trying to play respectability politics for people who will never respect you?
ALT
